Tuesday, September 29, 2009

An Extended Conversation (Part 2)

Please read part 1 here.

yahdavea: right

yahdavea: In other words, seeing myself now, my worries have been based on a focus turned on me and my abilities or inabilities... and I forgot Who it is that with Me and guiding me and constantly proving Himself to me... that He is faithful and reliable.

Rich: WOW! Yes

Rich: are those worries pointing to your abilities or His-Yes

yahdavea: There is such a strong urge to worry... to forget... as if He said... "Well Dave, I was there for you last week, ya know, just to get you going. Now the rest is up to you, kid."

yahdavea: right

Rich: right

Rich: once again living with orphan thoughts

yahdavea: orphan thoughts?

Rich: Father says, Son, we're in this together

Rich: living as an orphan,

yahdavea: oh... I have not left you as.... Got it


yahdavea: orphan thoughts.. Good there.

yahdavea: Lately I have put myself in panic mode

Rich: the biggest lie is that we R in this all alone

yahdavea: yes

Rich: panic mode spoke to me

yahdavea: for me it's been this growing need to have someone, in the flesh, to tell me what to do next

Rich: like the panic button on my remote car keys

Rich: right

Rich: we panic, press the button and pow, wow, oh there U R Father

yahdavea: ha

Rich: U know you can't remember where U parked the car, press the panic button, and you hear it and see it, oh, there it is


yahdavea: you do that too?

Rich: yup

yahdavea: The world is one big parking garage where every level, nook and cranny, just starts looking the same after a while.

Rich: it is going to be a continued imo (in my opinion) Him walking you through whatever other fears that will come only to use that in setting/making U free from the inside out

Rich: yes

yahdavea: I trust so, bro

yahdavea: I am so grateful to be reminded of all this

Rich: me 3

yahdavea: and how quickly we can turn back... to our own stinking weak abilities

Rich: simply reminding you of what you know is the truth as you do with me

yahdavea: right on Brutha

Rich: its not a one man show

yahdavea: no way José

Rich: its a family discovering together what it means and looks like to live and love one another

yahdavea: yes... hand in hand... and sometimes even foot in mouth

yahdavea: It's so huge... you know... just looking at this Life and all the pieces and parts.... and trying, with our finite minds to grasp it.

Rich: hahaha

Rich: it is

yahdavea: And it can be exhausting but He says LOOK TO ME


yahdavea: and that should quickly simplify things

yahdavea: But we want to see how it all works so we can play God

Rich: this life to quote the ghost and Mrs. Muir, is blood and swash

Rich: ha-right

Rich: blood

yahdavea: a lot of swash

Rich: yup

Rich: funny thing re: 'control' in the list of the fruit of the spirit being Love and all of the rest mere expressions of that love, the last expression is self-control-ha!

Rich: ok

yahdavea: wow right


Rich: regarding some things Dave shared with me that need to be kept private that is causing some unsettledness in him.

yahdavea: I mention it because I feel torn

yahdavea: would it be my depending less on God to build my biz?

yahdavea: Probably a crazy thought

yahdavea: What I mean is, I ask myself if joining such a group would be depending more on them than on God

Rich: ha. imo NO WAY, He is in you freeing you to live, and that does not spell control, as in if its Him, no bad thing will ever happen to me

Rich: no pain can touch me as a Jesus bubble boy~ha

yahdavea: So go with it

yahdavea: I think it's my fear of making the wrong decision

Rich: bro, go with the knowing that in all things He is there and will never leave you

yahdavea: And I know it's silly

yahdavea: I know He'd be with me either if I join or don’t

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