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Consider the plight of Olympians whose athletic career is now over. What now? What does one do with one’s life, when the vast proportion of it has been devoted to one goal: winning Olympic gold? These athletes, whose lives have been regimented thus far, often find the prospect of retiring frightening (see article: “Post Olympics not all fun and games”).
The word ‘vertigo’ comes to mind thinking on this matter, and the over powering parallels between these athletes and those who are now outside of the regimented confines of organized religion, especially with those in leadership who have ‘unselfishly’ abandoned all in the name of winning their gold.
The dizziness, disorientation is a mind numbing paralysis that stares them down; they see no solution, no way out of that which has become their hellish prison.
I have experienced this paralysis first hand, in being (euphemistically) ‘let go’ from my leadership position as a pastor years ago, I nose dived, crashed and burned.
There were initially two or three years I lived in deep depression, seeing any value, or worth being stripped from me as a man, a husband and as a father.
I was enveloped in a great sadness that hounded every breath I took.
Little did I realize at the time, this was going to be the very place where I was going to begin to discover what my true worth, value and purpose was as God’s child.
Apart from the goodness of God brining us to a place of sobriety and recognition that we are loved for who we are, something only His unconditional love is able to do; we will travel the well worn roads leading nowhere.
It’s as if this unconditional love of God the Father is like a portal that transports you into a whole new world, you step into it on this side of what has been defined as life to you, only to discover what has been guarded and reserved just for you regarding your worth, value and significance has been waiting but your arrival.
This security of being loved of the Father that has its source, roots deeply embedded in who God is, is going to press a lot of buttons in the lives of those who will fight to the death defending a God who is neither kind nor safe to approach.
The wastefulness of His love is all that is required to free us to walk free from our personal vertigo.
This video clip from youtube speaks of this vertigo many have or are experiencing.
For the die hard vertigo movie fans, this is for you.
Rich
5 comments:
That idea of seeking our identity in all else but Him comes to mind, Bro. I've been on that endless, insatiable merry-go-round as well. We finally discover that there is Life in none other. We are firmly grounded in Him.
Dave,
Yes, discovering that only He is able to set us free, and the Truth of His love for me/us right now is what I long for.
Rich,
Thank you for sharing more about your past experience leaving leadership as a pastor and the "vertigo" it caused. From "The God Journey" and other bloggers I've certainly heard quite similar stories. Always, breaks my heart in a sense. But at the same time, I rejoice in how Papa's hand brought healing, good, love and growth out it within these individuals...including you. For as you said, God picked you up right where you were at, and guided you into a Journey where you discovered your true worth, value and purpose as God’s beloved child.
Ah...I love what you said here:
"...this unconditional love of God the Father is like a portal that transports you into a whole new world, you step into it on this side of what has been defined as life to you, only to discover what has been guarded and reserved just for you."
"This security of being loved of the Father that has its source, roots deeply embedded in who God is, is going to press a lot of buttons in the lives of those who will fight to the death defending a God who is neither kind nor safe to approach."
I'm so grateful to Papa that He put you (via Internet/Blog) into my life, Rich.
Blessings,
~Amy :)
http://amyiswalkinginthespirit.blogspot.com
Amy,
It’s mutual my appreciation to the Father for you as well, being able to share in this journey of discovered love and delight He has in/for each of us.
I was sharing with a friend today if the Father is in us as us, then He is where we are in whatever circumstances we may find ourselves in. For me I am beginning to see that unless He opens the eyes of my heart right where I am, no matter how unpleasant things may appear or feel, I will try and get to that place that does spell greener grasses.
If I am not acting on, stepping out in the assurance of what He has said is the truth about me; I will make any and every excuse throwing in his face the facts that I am convinced have defined the truth of who I am, remaining a prisoner of my circumstances and situations. Does this make any sense?
The tension of conflicting counter messages will always be there in choosing to believe the Truth of Who’s and who I am verses how sin’s corrupting influence has stained my soul.
I am convinced there is a delusional thought process we all have apart from Father’s intervention. I believe what I, and many like me believe is that as soon as we say,’ uncle’ or Jesus’ as in my arm having been twisted to agree with the Truth about us according to the Father, magically any and all contesting or opposition will be vaporized. When everything doesn’t turn up roses after that, we are stunned and wonder what we did wrong.
Rich,
As one who has experienced vertigo in reality, I will attest to the fact that it is awful, paralyzing, sickening, and all-encompassing. There are, indeed, some parallels to the spiritual rug being pulled out from under me, as I am still experiencing. I gotta have more of that wasteful love!!
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