Wednesday, April 8, 2009
The following is from a brother, Mike Rule, you can view his blog here.
What he shared here is something in my opinion that was birthed out of his life being reduced to one thing, and in my opinion that one thing is, “That I might know Him”!
None of us who think we know our inner motives, reasoning’s, and heart attitudes know any reality apart from His divine untameableness blessing our lives by working utter devastation in them.
Jesus is NOT an add on to what may already be working so wonderfully well in your already smooth sailing life, He has come as a Ruling Prince, bearing a sword, His intent is division, separating the flesh from the spirit, and therein lies the unpronounceable pain.
Out from this prolonged agony is birthed the living ecstasy of knowing Him and wanting nothing more than for that burning reality to consume the wood, hay and stubble that I have known as living in the “real world.”
I am realizing more and more that our hope cannot be in what God is going to do in our situation. It cannot be in Him changing the circumstances; it cannot be in Him changing us IN the circumstances. Our hope can only be in Him, and Him alone. I teach, preach, and counsel that Jesus is enough, but in daily life I really struggle to believe it when God makes so little sense. Amen. I am glad to participate in His life, to be involved with a God who is not predictable, who really is not safe. But I am so thankful that He is good, all the time. However, there are SO many times when it does not FEEL like He is good.
Recently, as He and I were having a discussion, He point blank said, "Mike, I love you as you are. Flesh and all. Stop expecting yourself to change. Stop expecting me to do some miraculous thing to save you from your circumstances. Stop expecting me to do so miraculous thing to save you IN your circumstances. Am I not enough for you?" As I have continued to walk this journey and argue with God, I still continue to pray as He has led, "ENOUGH". During one of these discussion/arguments, He recently revealed something very profound. One of the Hebrew names of God - Shaddai - is translated into English as, "Almighty God", but it can also just as easily be translated to mean, "That's Enough." I find that interesting to say the least. The timing of His revelation is quite profound to me and not a coincidence I am sure. What does it all mean? I have no clue. In the past I would have made many assumptions about what it meant. Now? As I said, I have no clue. However, I trust Him to teach me in spite of all my kicking and screaming and cussing.
We all want so much attention from God. We want Him to make things go OUR way. We have huge temper tantrums when God does not do things the way we want, in the time we want. Most of us have made God into an idol, and we attempt to craft Him after our own designs, but He cannot be crafted. He cannot be forged. He does not play the game according to our rules, and so often He does not play the game according to our perception of His rules. Did it ever occur to you that your frustration is a revelation about your situation?
Can you take up the challenge to embrace this God who is untameable? It will be the greatest challenge of your life. He will not necessarily change you; He will not necessarily change your circumstances. Isn’t it arrogant of us to think He even wants to? We stress and fuss about our circumstances and think they are the problem. But the problem is rarely if ever the problem. WE fuss and stress about ourselves too, we conclude that maybe WE are the problem. Did it ever occur to you that it may not even be about your comfort or happiness?
Again, I ask, can you take up the challenge to embrace this God who is untameable? You will learn things about yourself that will make you shudder in revulsion. You will learn things about Him that you will not like. Yet you will also find encouragement and hope in spite of it all. Is it worth it? Honestly, I don't know. For me, the verdict is still out. But this I can say... just as the disciples said to Jesus, "To whom else can we go? Only You have the words of eternal life" Amen? Amen!
“May all your expectations be frustrated, may all your plans be thwarted, may all your desires be withered into nothingness, that you may experience the powerlessness and poverty of a child and sing and dance in the love of God who is Father, Son, and Spirit.”